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January 29 2012

How to dance the “Leland Shuffle” in 10 easy steps:

Step 1: Find your center. 

Step 2: Accept the inevitability of the dance.

Step 3: Snap yo’ fingers. 

Step 4: Rock it back…

Step 5: …and forth. 

Step 6: Grab a partner. No, literally, grab one!

Step 7: Get rejected. 

Step 8: Swallow sadness. 

Step 9: Begin weeping. The louder, the better. 

Step 10: Assume the fetal position. 

Well, there you have it, the legendary “Leland Shuffle.” Pull this baby out at the club this weekend, and we guarantee you’ll get more ass than a toilet seat. 

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    I just choked on my noodles. Perfect! GOD DAMN IT LELAND! STOP CAUSING SUCH A SCENE!
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